“But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart.” Luke 2:19
That’s how I felt over Christmas. I pondered so many things in my heart, wondering how it would be getting to spend Christmas here with the orphans but not spending it with my family. Would I make it through with shining colors or would I melt into a “woe is me” because I’m in a foreign country without most of my family? I guess that’s where God wanted me because He and I had such precious conversations. It’s amazing how God can minister to our hearts through His Spirit at the exact time you need it- Even when there’s a little “whine” in your voice and heart.
To be honest, I made it through and had a great Christmas! It truly was a magical time even though I was missing my family. It was so much fun shopping for the orphans with Cami and Rachael and watching them open their gifts at each of their Christmas parties! I felt so privileged to be here during this precious time! Watching some of the children open their gifts and helping the others open their gifts because they had never received a gift was mind blowing. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve seen kids open gifts, but this….this was so different. I was truly blown away how the older ones were just so thankful to get shampoo, deodorant, and body wash. They are so thankful for things we just take for granted. It reminded me that everything I have is truly a gift from my Loving Heavenly Father.
I realized and pondered during this time that in this life we have choices. Do I follow God or not? Do I choose to be content or miserable wherever He calls? Do I choose Him or do I choose myself? More times than I care to admit, I choose myself and my feelings. I have asked Jesus to help me to choose Him and His purpose over mine, but I have to admit, there are days that I just cave and feel sorry for myself. Then, I watch these precious children find such joy in what I think are “small” things and the joy they have every time we visit, I’m reminded that it’s about God’s love to the world through me and everyone that calls Jesus Lord.
May we all find our greatest purpose in living and loving through His purposes and supernatural power as we seek His will for our lives and not our own.
“I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” Galatians 2:20